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Jesse…Mr. Jackson, if you’re nasty…

September 25, 2002 | 6:17 am

‘cuse me…Jesse! Jesse Jackson! Yeah, you…Karin’s Baby Daddy. What’s this I hear about you frontin’ on the players behind the movie Barbershop? Like you and your old school civil rights posse walk on water! When did your shit stop stinking?

It’s called a joke, son. Don’t ya get it? Maybe you do…maybe that’s the point. Not everyone sees your old glory days in the same way. But most do, so take comfort in that, instead of wasting everyone’s time by trying to get the Barbershop crew to make edits to their movie. It’s a just a joke! Can’t be the first time you’ve heard the phrase “Fuck Jesse Jackson!”, ne?

From now on, when you think about how you’re disrespected in the movie, think of how you disrespected your wife when you were playing mattress lacrosse with Ms. Stanford. Stop frontin’ and get back to dealing with the real problems of the world.

It’s not like you’re Suge Knight or something….

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WTF! WTFH!! WTMFH!!!

September 8, 2002 | 6:18 am

Memo: To The Cleveland Browns

Gentlemen…I sincerely hope your collective asses will KEEP YOUR DAMN HELMETS ON YOUR FUCKING HEADS until you’re on the sidelines or in the locker room in the future!

You must also let me know of the internal efforts to get Rudd out of the Stadium without him being skinned alive. Should make for an interesting tactical term paper…

<BERNIEMACSTYLE>Sommamabitch!</BERNIEMACSTYLE>

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