JayFublerHarvey.com

For some strange reason you begin to hear the ‘Welcome back, Kotter’ theme playing in your mind…

After taking a nearly year long blogging sabbatical, I hath returned!
(So sayeth the shepherd, so sayeth the flock)

Welcome to my new self named website! It’s a conglomeration of personal thoughts, comedic moments, observations on world events, expressions of wonder (and disgust) involving the political process, travel photos from world wide trips, solutions for the future, re-evaluations of the past, and recommendations of the highest caliber fruit juices and hot sauces. :)

Feel free to comment on my posts to your hearts content. All voices will be heard!

For those interested in the past, this site does contains most of the content from my previous personal site. Just bear in mind that the blog posts here cover a period of more than seven years (we all change over time) and that I’m a big fan of the ‘tongue-through-cheek’ concept. ^^

So sayeth Tanny J :)

(Besides, we’re knee deep in the midst of the 2008 US election. There’s no way I couldn’t have my say on the whole shebang. ^_^)

Damnit.

It looks like my weakness for intelligent, sexy women seems to not only have come around to bite me in the ass, but it’s also left an ideological tattoo that I’ll have trouble explaining to even my grandchildren.

I wouldn’t have thought too much of it if I had fallen to the charms of one my faves (Soledad O’Brien, Lisa Ling, Aisha Tyler, Ming Na), but this time it comes in the form of someone whom lies in the land of 180 degrees away from all thats liberally sane and hopeful. ^^

Now…see…when conservative pundit Michelle Malkin was looking for a new host for her popular blog a while back, I suggested my webhost, Hosting Matters. (Yes, I read Michelle. Gotta hear more than one side, right? Well, why not from a well written cutie pie?)

While I never heard back from her (I am just a lowly liberal type of guy ^_-), I found it very interesting to discover months down the road that she was actually using Hosting Matters as her new webhost.

(Note: I have no proof that she actually decided on Hosting Matters based on my suggestion. But it does make for a very interesting coincidence ^^)

Not only did Michelle take advantage of this excellent webhost, but apparantely she successfully recommended it to a number of her pundit friends, including other popular conservative blogs, like Instapundit and Power Line.

Fast forward to late January: the whole Mohammed cartoon fiasco. Michelle posts the actual cartoons on her blog. (Brave…Stupid…you decide)

Fast forward to today: Hosting Matters gets a denial of service attack from Saudi Arabia. All of the blogs go down big time.

Still today: Because of this DOS attack, all my sites go down too!!! (F me!)

Bleh.

So much for helping just for charity (and cutie’s) sake…

Godspeed and peaceful journey to the comedian’s comedian. Arguably the most influential comedian of the past 50 years, the great Richard Pryor passed away today at the age of 65. (Bring on the Pryor tributes!)

This saddens me on a more personal note, since Richard was one of my own comedic cores. I could listen to him for hours, and not only never get tired, but stay amazed at his willingness to go the full mile. The man brought the pain and wasn’t afraid to put all of himself out there for his art. The man was pure genius…a truly brilliant motherfucker. :)

Sleep well, Mudbone. We’ll see you in the next life…
At least the cookies didn’t blow up again… ^_-

(and yes, Richard….it was something you said…)

When I took Chemistry in high school, my teacher told us of certain chemical combinations to never even think about attempting to mix during our labs.

You know…the heinous shiz that would need to be thrown out of the window within 10 seconds before half of the school landed on the Wonder Bread factory next door. You know…the heinous shiz you wrote down for later…just in case you needed to take out a really big mutha…

There are such combinations out in there in real life too. Or so they say…
Unlike those high school chemicals, I don’t think some things that seem at times to be so caustic together, need to be forever separated.

I had two such items of historical significance sitting in my bookshelf, so I decided to bring them together for tea and crumpets….

I was initially surprised when I placed them together…no explosions! The skin didn’t melt off of my face. I wasn’t blinded the competing glories of whatever and whathaveyou. The milk in my fridge didn’t even go sour.
(Tho, throught it all, I did have my fire extinguisher nearby…)

What fascinated me most was what happened between the two test participants. They talked…they laughed. They shared stories of Abraham and Jesus. They compared publisher and agents. They made top ten lists of the biggest assholes who’ve used them for their own personal gain. They even realized that they have the same favorite movie: “Dodgeball”.

They left a comment to be placed in this report: “Please read us both. Don’t let sound bites and what your friend thought they heard guide your learning. Actually pick us up to see the unfiltered story…you’d be stunned what we both have in common.”

Qur’an and Bible have retired back to the bookshelf. They invited the Bhagavad-Gita over a few beers and to read through my dirty limerick book…

There are just some occurances in life which, at first glance, are quite miniscule, but with deeper consideration, surely must have bigger stories behind them…

For your examination: A Quest for Footware!

A 30 something enters a store…looking for a decent pair of sandals. The store is filled with the energy of the RugRat(tm)…I release the safety catch on my pistol…there’s too many ugly feet around. The mixture of leather and cheapness burns my nostrils…the pain slowly turns to pleasure…there’s even more ugly feet around. Anger is beautiful…blood spills from elevator…I eat a plate of rice and beans….the true messiah is Cookie Monster…

Err…umm…what the hell? @_@

Back in this reality, I found a perfectly fine pair of sandles. When I got home and started to remove the papers and such from the box, at the bottom, I found something interesting:

(Trojan Maaan!)

…well the corner of one anyway. I’m still rather perplexed as to what a piece of a condom wrapper is doing in new box of shoes. Perplexed as to the *true* nature…the possibilities are enough for a thousand Sci-Fi channel original movies. While ideas run through my head, I keep coming back to one simple question:

Has someone been fucking my sandles?

(Anyone want to loan me an ultraviolet light?)

Isn’t it high time that everyone…bloggers, mainstream media, individuals with the capacity for intelligent thought…not only stop listening to this man, but stop reporting everything crazy-ass Pat Robertson says?

The last straw: Pat recently advocated assassination of the Venezuelan president, Hugo Chavez. “You know, I don’t know about this doctrine of assassination, but if he thinks we’re trying to assassinate him, I think that we really ought to go ahead and do it,” says Robertson.

Jesus would be so proud of his spokesman…:P

He’s like the old, drunk fool on the bus that quotes scripture the live-long day, and knows how to solve all of your (and the world’s) problems, but then asks you for some change so he can get another bottle.

The only way to truly get rid of him is to pretend he doesn’t exist. He’ll eventually choose another bus or shut up completely after a while. Robertson is just another version of Reverend MadDog 20-20, just with a larger audience.

Ignore this politician pretending to be a Christian (I know I will). There’s so many more important things to report on these days…

From the “It’s terroristical similar, but they’re not England, so the press will be less” department:

In a 45 minute period, over 350 bombs were detonated throughout the entire country of Bangladesh, killing 1, injuring 125.

“Jamayetul Mujahedin, an Islamic militant group, claimed responsibility for the attacks in leaflets distributed around many of the blast sites.”

350 bombs in 62 of the country’s 64 districts…
The bombs might have been small, but the quantity and timing should give everyone some serious pause…

…well, just in that country. Doesn’t make a difference in this country unless it ends in “-Queda” or is based in the middle east… :P

Instead of hearing sound bites on the news, or letting blogs of various ideologies twist the story in one way or another, how about getting something full and indepth from the lady’s mouth?

Cindy Sheehan, the mother of a fallen soldier who’s been camping outside of GW’s ranch, finally gets a chance to give her full story, without spin from anyone.

Rock on, Ms. Sheehan!
It’s doubtful he’ll meet with you…but your stand connects strongly with many in this country. Accountability indeed!

[Update: Read all of Cindy's posts here and watch the spin come to a stop]

I studied under this man for more than 3/4ths of my life when I was huffing smaller items like glue and weed wacker/lawnmower gas. Just when I thought I was coming into my own, Playa here just ups the ante a thousand fucking fold!

Gold Spray Paint, son! Even the police didn’t know what to make of this. When you’re standing in the prescence of true genius, what more can be said?

Bravo, my Lord! Bravo!

[Thanks to B & R for injections]

So…it’s perfectly fine for the states to decide who you can legally love…and whether or not your own life is yours for the taking…

But the smoking of mary jane even just for medical purposes is solely the domain of the federal government…and therefore not legal by their standards…so sayeth the Supreme Court.

Bullshit. Complete and utter…

Getting congress to actually repeal the federal law will be a monstrously difficult task…all the while suffering people will have no choice but to break the law…

Or…use the ‘legal’ drugs the government has gotten paid to force us to take by the pharmaceutical industry at prices numerous times higher than anywhere else in the world.

Sounds like that’s really the whole point…

Light ‘em up, folks. Puff, puff, give…